Max's Journal: A Trip Without Time
by Anste'Dak
Summary: The journal based story continues, revolving around Max Caulfield and Chloe Price. We take a look at the PTSD side of surviving the horrible events that occurred now a year ago.


*Author's Note*

Wanted to mention real quick that this short story takes place in the same universe as my last story. I would recommend reading my previous one before continuing with this one. This is simply a continuation of Max's Journal: Life After Arcadia. I will be releasing more original works at later times, but I'm pretty busy in my personal life so a "sequel" was within my current grasp. Hope you enjoy.

October 6th

Today was a normal day. Just another day in the life of Max Caulfield. I woke up, went to work, came home and relaxed. Though I promise in a couple days, I will have more to write about. I'm so excited for our roadtrip to begin. After talking about a roadtrip to Portland for so long it's crazy to think it's finally happening. We're taking a 5-day week off starting tomorrow. The first day is preparations, packing and shopping for supplies. Day two is when our trip begins. Day three is when we actually arrive, and we stay at a hotel for that day and day four. Then we drive home on day five. Although I am excited, it's a double edged sword. This week is the one year anniversary of that fateful week. I'm hopeful our trip will keep my mind off of it all, but I've already been having nightmares. Chloe has been my rock. No matter whats going on in my head, she's there to make it all better.

October 7th

Today was day one. We went out to our local store and picked up basic things. Food, drinks, clothing, etc. We packed up Chloe's CD's in preparation for our long trip. It will take a few hours to reach our destination, and we left pretty late. My mom and dad are watching over our dog at their house. And so our trip begins.

I'm currently sitting in the passenger seat of the truck writing, while Chloe drives and we blast her music. It's dark, the moon is out, the wind blows strong through the windows. I can tell by her attitude Chloe is more excited about this than me. Of course, I know she's been planning this before I even came back into her life. This marks that day. I remember it vividly. I stand by Warren, discussing movies, as Nathan comes up and threatens me. In rides Chloe in this truck, lifting me away. We spent the afternoon in her room, dancing and talking. We hike up the hill and that is where I first revealed my secret to her. The secret that would shape the both of our lives forever. I'm going to try and sleep now. Even though for some totally unexplainable reason, I doubt it'll come easy.

October 8th

Sleep eluded me last night, as I thought it would. At least I got a couple hours. This was day two. We could probably reach the hotel today if we tried, but we want to make this last. I drove for a few hours while Chloe got her turn for shut-eye, and eventually we passed a sign that stated "Longview Beach" I pulled over the truck and we went exploring a bit. We found the beach and decided we might as well have a quick swim. We had packed swimming clothes. Swimming is the one activity we do together that blocks out the rest of the world. When we float together in the water, it feels as though we're flying away. From our problems, from the world. Even back to this day last year.

Late at night we swam in the Blackwell pool. I remember that day just as clearly. I woke up and met Chloe at the diner. I show off of my abilities and she takes me to her American Rust. We played with a gun and hung out by the tracks. I saved her life on those tracks for the second time. When I got to school, I had no clue what would happen. I saved my friend's life, from herself. I think about her almost everyday. Kate Marsh. I promised her we'd have our next tea session, but instead allowed her to be swept up by the storm. Chloe woke me up late that night to break into the school and be detectives. We found the clues we needed and took our late night swim, followed by a chase from the premises. Ever since, swimming is something we've done often, among other things.

Despite all these horrible memories, she really has made my life better than ever. This year has been the best of my life. I couldn't imagine it any other way. After swimming for a while, we dried off, and hopped back in the truck. She was the driver once again. She complains, but I know she loves having control over the truck. Her and this truck have a crazy bond. It is now getting dark again, I am drifting back to sleep. By tomorrow, we'll be at our hotel. Here's to another tortured night.

October 9th

Yet another night of little sleep. I won't tell Chloe about these nightmares, she doesn't need to know. She's having fun, and I'm happy when she's happy. Early in the morning we reached the hotel. We unloaded our bags and brought them up into our room after checking in. It's a decent hotel, nothing small, nothing big. They do have a massive pool though. You'll never guess what we did first.

Whoa, how'd you guess that?

After going for another swim, we made our way to the diner. We ordered our food and had an amazing meal. Just the word "diner" reminds me of the Two Whales, and that Wednesday. Waking up the night after swimming in Blackwell, next to Chloe in her bed. We lay in peace, listening to the sounds of the outdoor world. She dared me to kiss her. I did. It seems so trivial now. I went downstairs and helped Joyce make breakfast. I think about her a lot too. I wonder what she would think of us now. She'd be proud of her daughter. I bet she never imagined when we were young and playing pirates around the house, that the two of us would end up like this. Or maybe she did. We went to the diner and looked inside Frank's RV. We found pictures of him and Rachel, and speaking of pictures, I traveled into one. That was intense.

I saved Chloe's father, William, and changed everything. Chloe ended up paralyzed and I spent the night at her house. Doing whatever she wanted. I often think of this alternate Chloe, is she still out there, somewhere? It hurts my head to think about. After a meal we spent the rest of the day in our hotel room. Just doing things. We watched Blade Runner on TV. We stayed up very late, just talking as we usually do. We never have anything to talk about, but we somehow find a way to keep talking. There was a moment where we just stared. It was interrupted by a flying pillow towards my face, but that wasn't totally unexpected.

October 10th

Day four. Last night wasn't as bad as the previous nights in terms of sleep. I think because I was in a bed, and because of Chloe. We had breakfast in the diner and went for one last swim. Might as well use up the pool while we can. Afterwards we spent the day exploring. We came across this cool store that had all these unique souvenirs. If Chloe spends money on a souvenir, you know it's cool. We also found this arcade. We may or may not have spent more than a couple hours there. Just maybe. We also stopped to watch a movie at the local cinema. We didn't stay for the whole thing, we honestly just wanted the popcorn. While we drove from place to place I thought back on the events of this day a year ago.

I woke up alongside the bed of alternate Chloe, and went back to fix everything. All that took, was letting William die. I had never been so happy to see Chloe in my whole life. My Chloe. We did some exploring by investigating Nathan's dorm, stopping by Frank's, and then put the clues together in Chloe's room. Those clues led us to the worst place I've ever witnessed in my life. The Dark Room. In which we found pictures of Jefferson's victims, including snuff shots of Rachel. We drove to the junkyard and found her body. It was awful. Rachel's body had been under Chloe's feet all this time. She curled up and cried as I held her close in an attempt to comfort her. Later that night was the End of The World party. We went looking for Nathan, and wound up running into Warren. I try not to mention Warren. He is one of the forever looming thoughts in my head. I killed him. He was in love with me, and I killed him. Fitting, as that night I saw Chloe die. Shot in the head, right in front of me. It felt slow motion as her body plopped down on the grave of her dead friend. It was then revealed that the killer was my teacher the whole time. I don't remember the rest of that night as he drugged me and took me to his dark room. The most horrifying night. I tried to banish these thoughts from my mind as we traveled around the town.

We eventually returned to the hotel and as it was getting late, we popped into the hotel bar. I didn't drink, I never do, but Chloe wouldn't be Chloe if she didn't have at least a little to drink. We're now lying in bed, chatting as I write this. I don't want to fall asleep. But Chloe needs her sleep, we'll not to stop talking soon. Then I'll be alone with my thoughts. Despite this being an amazing week and fun trip, I've been plagued with these thoughts and I'm sick of them. I wish I could forget it all.

October 11th

This was the last day of our trip. At the time of me writing this, it is the 12th. I'm lying in our own bed back at home, with our dog. Where to begin with the last day of our trip? We sampled everything for the last time before packing back up and heading back into our truck. The hotel was a blast, I would for sure love going there again. We began our drive back, playing our music again. I felt very sick. One year ago from the day, was the day everything changed. Was the day that has haunted my dreams many times. Was the day everyone in Arcadia Bay died. I tried to take a nap during our drive but woke up startled. Chloe asked what was wrong but I didn't give her a straight answer. I figured I could keep my composure and stop her from worrying about me. I was wrong. My breathing picked up speed, I started to sweat, and my vision became blurred. Was I having a panic attack? I frantically asked her to pull over, and she did. I busted out of the truck and sped walked up the nearby hill. The sun was starting to set over the horizon as I tried to compose myself.

"Max, wait!" Chloe yelled up to me as she tried to catch up. I couldn't stop moving. I just had to stay in motion.

"Max, please!" She called out again, the worry in her voice clearly growing. I collapsed to my knees and buried my face in my palms. I saw the faces of the people of Arcadia. Kate, Joyce, Warren, David, Frank, everyone. All of them in pain, accusing me. I couldn't contain it anymore and I busted out crying. I fell on my side as Chloe finally reached me. She wrapped her arms around me tightly as I unleashed all of the buried emotions I've contained these past five days. Chloe already knew what was wrong.

"It's okay, Max. It's okay. Just talk to me." I struggled to speak. I barely managed to form a response.

"I can't forget them!" I cried. "I killed them all. It was all me! So many people living their lives, or working towards a future, are all dead now." Chloe didn't respond right away. She gave me a chance to let it all out.

"Your mom, she's dead because of me!"

"Max, you are the most amazing person to have ever lived on this planet. You were given this incredible gift, as a 'fuck you' from the universe, but you took that and shoved it up it's ass. You stood tall in every situation, you saved my ass over and over and I will never be able to repay that. The best I can do is be with you here, and forever, and make sure you always know what happened was not your fault. You did what you could in a shitty situation, and you walked out an even stronger person. Not a day goes by I'm not amazed by you. What you've been through, all that you've done. I can't think of a single person on this world who could have done what you did. You have nothing to be guilty about, if anything I'm the reason they're all dead. I never ever want you to feel this weight on your shoulders. The best we can do is move on and live our lives happily. That's how we'll make it up to all of them. By living out our dreams and proving to the world we can do it. We can be what we want to be. We are not controlled by time."

As she said this, I sat sobbing, taking in every word. Even if I didn't 100% believe what she said, I felt a heavy weight being taken off my shoulders as if she was lifting it off herself and placing it on her own shoulders. She was tearing up as well. I lunged forward and squeezed her tightly. We sat here for many moments more.

Now, hours later, I'm in our home. OUR home. On OUR bed. With OUR dog. Making a living. This week is over, and I don't know if I'll ever be totally okay. But with Chloe here with me, I'll never be totally miserable. If I was alone now, after everything, I wouldn't be alive right now. That's just the truth. How is it I feel so blessed and so cursed? But I will keep living life with the most important person in the world to me, and we'll keep getting happier and happier. We'll keep kicking the world's ass.


End file.
